Meetings are a dangerous thing
Written by: Beck
Yesterday, I had the great misfortune of attending a required training session for a bunch of systems and policies here at work that, in two months, will no longer be in any way relevant to me. I spent the bulk of the session trying to make the guy next to me burst out laughing at a nice and inappropriate moment (i.e. any moment). One upshot of this whole productivity destroying activity (by which I mean the meeting, not the trying to make Clint laugh) was a top-ten list I penned on the back of a handout. I still have the handout, and for lack of anything else to post while I kill the last few minutes of today's shift, I'm reprinting it here for everyone's reading enjoyment.
Hopefully management (who will no doubt stumble upon this the moment it's out there on the internet) won't fire me the minute they read it.
Top 10 signs that your energy trading company is screwed:
10) Acronym DOA used for employee trading guidelines. (Seriously--we have this).
9) When you need to have a meeting so you can be instructed not to trade with a counterparty listed on something called the "Do Not Trade List"
8) Employees spend time in meetings writing top 10 lists.
7) More power plants than employees
6) Your boss asks you if you know anyone who's hiring
5) "Back office" refers to the big stall in the men's room
4) Art gets fired, but -------- still has a job
3) Vice-president level authorization required to send someone a shirt
2) Asset analysts replaced by CEO's cat "Mister Binky."
1) Three words: Voluntary Severance Package