Written by: Beck
Iraqi terrorists have
kidnapped six truck drivers and are threatening to behead them, one every 72 hours, if their respective countries don't pull all military support out of Iraq. There's just one small problem: the truck drivers' home countries--Egypt, Kenya, and India--aren't members of the coalition. They don't have any troops in Iraq. Oops.
And one other thing... the group calls itself "Holders of the Black Banners." Is it my imagination, or are Iraqi
militant terrorist groups running out of names? I'm reminded of the scene from Monty Python's
Life of Brian with the various Jewish liberation movements having trouble keeping track of which liberation movement they belong to. Come to think of it, the situation in Iraq mirrors Life of Brian in a frightening number of ways, apart from the whole taking-place-in-the-Middle-East bit:
Reg: If you want to join the People's Front of Judea, you have to really hate the Romans.
Brian: I do!
Reg: Oh yeah, how much?
Brian: A lot!
Reg: Right, you're in.
...
Reg: All right, but apart from the sanitation, medicine, education, wine, public order, irrigation, roads, the fresh water system and public health, what have the Romans ever done for us?
Attendee: Brought peace?
Reg: Oh, peace - shut up!
Reg: There is not one of us who would not gladly suffer death to rid this country of the Romans once and for all.
Dissenter: Uh, well, one.
Reg: Oh, yeah, yeah, there's one. But otherwise, we're solid.
Just replace "Romans" with "Americans" and you've got the trasncript for the latest Iraqi Insurgent Recruiting Video.