Incite -- (v) 1: give an incentive; 2: provoke or stir up; "incite a riot"; 3: urge on; cause to act
Sunday, March 28, 2004

Why I don't like college kids
Written by: Dave

Writing a response to Answerman's provocative note on the crisis of conservatism is near the top of my to do list. Unfortunately I have been rather busy lately and don't have the mental energy to write anything really substantive right now. In the meantime I'll just write about a topic that comes easily to me -- my seething contempt for college kids.

Before I go any further, let me admit up front that I am unduly prejudiced by jealousy, as I suffered through four years of an institution dedicated to snuffing out all of the fun associated with the college experience. Let me also note that I was heavily influenced by my exposure to Answerman and Beck during their years in a different but highly distinguished academic institution. As far as I could tell, the greatest challenge of their college experience seemed to be finding a way to fill the time between registering for classes and showing up to these classes for the first time to ace the final exams.

Now I have nothing but respect for all those students working their way through college, or graduating with a degree in nuclear engineering in three years, or taking care of their sick grandmothers, etc, etc, but that's not the type of student I am writing about. He (or she) has a quite different existence. You probably knew someone like him yourself, or maybe it is or was you (as it would have been me had it not been for my inexplicable decision to put myself through four years of misery instead).

That's right, I am talking about all those students majoring in some ridiculously easy liberal arts field where earning a 3.5 requires showing up to a few classes, discussing feelings, and writing a few essays. True, these students also have some other responsibilities, such as pursuing the opposite sex, drinking a lot of alcohol, calling their parents to ask for more money, attending college sporting events, and occasionally bathing themselves.

Now my real problem isn't the students that get to enjoy this lifestyle, it's the students who get to enjoy this lifestyle but DON'T APPRECIATE IT! The typical college student is at the very apex of our society, enjoying most of its benefits while contributing nothing. But for some reason, many college students feel the need to reflexively denounce the society and armed forces that support their cushy lifestyle, and complain about how our culture is oppressing and exploiting them. I mean, c'mon, how can they keep a straight face when they talk about exploitation -- don't they realize that they're the first stop on the gravy train?

So if you are one of those college students out there living the good life, don't feel guilty, keep enjoying yourself while you have the opportunity. And naturally you shouldn't stop questioning our society and examining its many, many faults. But please just have enough humility to appreciate the fact that society is treating you pretty dang well right now.

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