Written by: Beck

Oh, it was Canada? Close enough. Canadian prison guards in maximum security "correctional facilities" (jails? what are those?) are not going to be allowed to wear stab-proof vests. Why not you ask? BECAUSE IT WOULD HURT THE INMATES FEELINGS, THAT'S WHY. You inconsiderate bastards. Criminals are people too, damnit, and they deserve as much of a free, unobstructed shot at stabbing a prison guard as anyone else.

Oh, you think I'm kidding?

EDMONTON -- Corrections Canada won't let guards at maximum security prisons wear stab-proof vests because it sends a confrontational "signal" to prisoners. "If you have that kind of presence symbolized by (a stab-proof vest), you're sending a signal to the prisoner that you consider him to be a dangerous person," said Tim Krause.

Because obviously all that nonsense with bars, locks, walls, razor wire, guard towers, spot lights, and attack dogs has nothing to do with these people being dangerous.