Written by: Beck

For lack of the substantive, today I bring you the most amusing of the insubstantial.

First up to bat is ABC's TV show Nightline which made a little scene over their recent decision to air an episode that consisted of nothing but Ted Koppel reading off the names of every American soldier who has died in Iraq. The scene went something like this:

A bunch of people: This is just a Liberal attempt to smear the administration while hiding under the guise of patriotism!
ABC: Nuh-uh!

In the end, the show was a ratings boost, and was actually pretty well received. You know that the controversy has officially moved out of the realm of serious debate and into that realm occupied only by a few of the more easily upset species of moonbats when you discover it has the Bill O'Reilly seal of approval.

Despite Wallace's criticism, "Nightline" received support Tuesday from Fox News Channel's best-known personality. Bill O'Reilly said Koppel displayed neutrality and he took ABC's word that it was a tribute.

"There is no anti-war record on 'Nightline's' rap sheet," O'Reilly wrote in a column that appeared in the Los Angeles Times. "Koppel reported the war straight when he was embedded with invading U.S. troops last spring."

Moving on to more important things, Courtney Love has once again opted to expose her boobs before a large audience. This time it was before a music festival in Atlanta, GA. And The Sun has the pictures to prove it (hint: not work safe). For those in need of a diet looking for the ultimate in appetite suppressants, have yourself a nice long look at that picture, and I promise you'll never want to touch another bite of food again. (Link credit to Fark).

Airports will begin using biometrics to regulate who should & should not be allowed access to certain areas. Makes sense for airports. Assuming they're a success and not a time-wasting bug-filled nightmare, it should be interesting to see how these applications spread to the private sector, to say nothing of the reaction of the privacy protection lobby.

Former Astros player Moises Alou has revealed the secret to his fantastic batting ability. We at INCITE officially recommend that you NOT try this at home:

Alou says the secret to hitting without batting gloves is to harden your hands and prevent calluses. One of his methods might win someone the prize money on the TV show, "Fear Factor." He urinates on his hands. That's the honest truth. Alou said he isn't sure where he learned this distasteful folk medicine, but it wasn't from his famous father. And it works for Moises.