Written by: Beck

Well, looks like the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy movie--which the world has been waiting on for a quarter of a century--totally sucks balls.

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy movie is an abomination. Whereas the radio show, TV show, books and computer game are all recognisably variations on a theme, this is something new and almost entirely unrelated. It’s not even a good film if viewed as an original work: the characters are unsympathetic, the cast exhibit no chemistry, the direction is pedestrian, the pace plodding, the special effects overpowering (lots and lots of special effects, none of them funny mind you) and above all the script is amazingly, mindbogglingly awful. Oh, and they have taken most of the jokes out.

This is a terrible, terrible film and it makes me want to weep.

The reviewer is clearly a lover of Adams & the books, so it isn't like someone who just doesn't enjoy British humor or sci-fi is bashing it. What's more, his primary complaint isn't some sort of purists' crying about changes to the original (after all, it's hard to really pin down an original with the Hitchhiker's Guide, what with how it has already appeared in at least 4 different forms, each of which had significant differences from the others. No, assuming this review isn't a complete fabrication, it would appear that the H2G2 movie just really really bites.

(Hat tip: IFOC)